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The Hallmead Cat

An interview

jane fae
3 min readOct 24, 2020
Ulfric, aka Mr Paws, goes public for the first time

Following an “incident” earlier this week, involving a trampoline and an unsuspecting local resident, the spotlight turns tonight on Ulfric, aka Mr Paws, the Hallmead cat. An interview.

Ulfric…I may call you that?

  • Iz.

Or Mr Paws?

  • Iz. Juss not the full nam…

You mean?

  • No! Don say it!

Sorry. This week, there was some concern when you were discovered sheltering underneath a trampoline belonging to an unsuspecting local resident.

  • Iz. Waz rainin!

Yes. Although — and I hope you’ll forgive me for mentioning this — you ARE a Norwegian Forest Cat.

  • Iz.

A member of a proud and ancient race of cats, clearly used to harsh weather. And with a waterproof overcoat…

  • Iz!
Generic Cat image by Pieter Lanser from The Netherlands: This file is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic license.

So a little rain should not really bother you. Some people have suggested that you may have gone a little soft…

  • Iz not soft. Some catz likez the finer thingz…

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jane fae
jane fae

Written by jane fae

Feminist, writer, campaigner on political and sexual liberty who also knows a bit about IT, the law and policing. Not entirely serious…

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